Tuesday, February 8, 2011, 6:47 PM
No one understands how everything and everyone is important to me.
Basically my life is just a piece if garbage.
I'm not as emotional as I sound.
I've learnt that life comes with disappointments and just plain bad luck.
I've gone through way too much to know that truth.
I've earned that truth really.
I blame myself though.
I never explain myself when I need to because I'm always too mad or annoyed.
I sigh at my friends saying they don't understand because I never want to explain.
I lose people who genuinely care about me because I sigh at them.
I will end up fighting my battles alone because I keep losing people who genuinely care about me.
I'm so useless.
I can't even convince people to believe in my dreams. Even if it doesn't affect them.
All I've heard has been
"Seriously?!"
"You're kidding right?"
"It's so hard"
"Oh."
"I never really thought that you'd.."
And I have my pride not to give up my dream but it doesn't mean I don't get discouraged.
I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle.
It's me against the world.
And the world fucking hates me.
I'm not implying there's nothing truly amazing about my life.
I cherish the little things like when it gets 5degrees warmer or when I go for sleepovers.
Maybe a 100% on a test or a warm hug.
But If life only has the little things, and all the real things crumble.
What's left?
I'm a complete hypocrite though.
I just told Elena that life IS worth living.
That the small things can make you happy.
I'm a fucking liar.
Labels: complaints, family, life
Sunday, July 18, 2010, 10:30 AM
My fail attempt at being sexy ahaa.Going to Kampar I realised I didnt need the hectic life I had in KL. I am just as happy, maybe even happier, staying at home, doing nothing.
Oh oh have you heard? Spain is deemed champion of World Cup 2010. If you haven't, what hole do you live in? I'm still unsure about how I feel about it :D
Coming back from Kampar, I've done alot. Some, I can't really blog about. Shh =x Ask me in msn!
I went to bon odori for one. I was supposed to attend an event in the morning of that day. But I was semi-grounded. Alamak. Michelle picked me up and we went to bon odori! We were late. Isn't much to do there anyways, besides lining for overpriced food, bumping into random people, wasting credit trying to find who you're SUPPOSED to, fear people stepping on your feet or stealing your stuff and.. see cute guys! (: Though, I got to see Bego! Was overjoyed by that really.
Slept at Michelle's place that night. Her brother's friends are crazy. Next day I went to mv to pick up a cd. Then met up with Stacy! Outings with her mean shopping and eating. Both awesome. So broke wtfark so broke.
Labels: family, friends, life, random, shopping
Tuesday, June 29, 2010, 3:36 AM
mhmmmmmm. Sexy half naked black white and yellow Ryo for me.Lately everyone i've been hanging out with or seeing has been getting screw. I'm cursed I tell you. Seriously. Stay far far away from me.
Shit job over! fuuweet! We sold EVERYTHING we had on the last day. Me isha happeh.
I'm going on an adventure tomorrow. To Kampar! via bloody ktm which makes a supposedly hour long journey become 3 hours. ThankyouMalaysianpublictransport. ILYSM. But i'm all phsyced to see my brother! Usually, i'm not a sisterly kinda sister but lately, I miss my dai lou ): I doooooo. Breaks my heart knowing I wont be able to see him for such a long time after i've gone to the US. Alamak.
Miss me you buggers.
Labels: family
Monday, June 14, 2010, 7:51 AM
Meet parkpark. He's an awesome piece of cardboard. Yes he is (:
So todaay, I wanted to sleep in but nooo, random people had to call me and text me. Why is it when I'm not to be bothered, all sorts of random people look me up but when I'm actually bored or in need, no one's free?! aha, life's a bitch.
Some shit happened to me today. Alaa, not gonna go into details but basically my life and future is screwed. Thank you life, for being so good to me. FML. I still dont know what to do, so if you somehow see me these few days, looking like a zombie, give me a hug. Yes?
Rebecca came over. Didnt tell her I was emo though. Seeing a friend was enough I guess. Karen wanted to come straight away but I told her to go find HJ. LOL. So she's forcing me to watch the world cup with her, HJ and some random people. In the middle of the night. Apparently, the world's a stand still thanks to those people kicking their balls around.
Michelle called, talking to her made me better. Problem not solved but when I realised how much my friends actually care about me, I feel like one of the luckiest people alive. She called me as soon as she saw my text and all the way from tioman during her holiday.
My brother was a blast too. He was soooo there for me. Aha, I realised i miss him so much. We dont get along on the surface but in the end I still think he's the best dai lou ever.
I emailed my mum, talked to my dad. Still, lost.
Karen ah Karen. Thanks for being there. Thanks for acting like YOU wanna see me because i'll never admit how much I need you. Thanks for coming all the way here for me.
Labels: complaints, family, friends, life
Saturday, May 29, 2010, 1:53 AM
uhh.
arghh.
wtf.
Just got off the phone with my mum. She thinks everything is so easy. She thinks I dont miss her as much as she misses me. She thinks I WANT to live with my dad.
She honestly cannot be more wrong.
Labels: complaints, family, life
Friday, May 28, 2010, 6:22 AM
I realised that an outing with Stacy means - good, seductive, fattening foods. Not that i'm complaining. Seriously, look at it. That was only dessert wtf.
Went to KLCC to meet her. Had to wake up at 11 again. Panda yayyy. We were both pain stakingly tired today so we didnt do much. Eat, and eat agains.Travelling from home to klcc is not fun when my dai lou isnt here ): I miss him.
Hence it took me 2 hours to get home from klcc despite me living 20mins away. Nice.
My bitch is in went off for her mission trip today. Her text at 5am woke me up. I replied! HAH, me awesomes. I miss her already. Change the world and come back in one piece okay? ♥
